We Should All Start a Fire

Robin Jackman, Hazel Blears, people serving warm beers,
F1, cold tea, Natasha Kaplinsky
Trevor Francis, itchy bum, Russians with Polonium,
RBS, AIG, and RyanAir’s O’Leary
Will Farrell, sushi, Andy Cole of Chelski
Noel Edmonds, wonton, slimy David Cameron
Paxman, Tax men, poxy films like X-Men
Impressionist John Culshaw, I just can’t take it anymore


Of these we all start to tire
Thru the years we’re learning
Hear my stomach turning
I need a gun for hire
Tho I’ve tried to fight it
But my life’s been blighted, by

Greedy city bailouts, lifting in the lineouts,
Credit Crunch, Iraq War, Charlton’s hopeless back four
Big Brother, short men, Archer wrote a book again
Joggers, chuggers, people who say Rugger
Comedians with swimming pools, parents hitting staff in schools
Shaven Peter Mandelson, Owen Wilson, Aniston
Fox hunting, tennis, McGregor’s Phantom Menace
Mighty Boosh, Glen McGrath , and no-one serving at the bar


Tattoos of your girlfriends, Budget speech that never ends
My Bank Manager, offensive Bernhard Gallagher
Daily Mail columnists, photographers that take the piss
Green bins, Mini-Me, ballroom dancing on tv
Little Britain went too long, the latest Red Nose Day song
Eurovision all gone wrong, now that Terry Wogan’s gone
Blooper shows, job cuts, Flock of Seagulls haircuts
Horne and Corden, load of crap, as funny as a dose of clap


Golf electric trolleys, people who use brollies
Tory Party, Watergate, Bono and the Modern Tate
Jacqui Smith, talking shite, it won’t be alright on the night
Fred the Shred, Conrad Black,I want my bloody money back
Powdered Gavin Henson, anyone called Jensen
Davos, Argos, piss-weak US lagers
Fascists, Nazis, no paper in the khazi
George Osbourne in my head, I think I’d better go to bed

2 thoughts on “We Should All Start a Fire

  1. Hey, the Mighty Boosh is highly amusing. Worrying that we agree in the other 47 things though … and you forgot to mention the Quo.

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